After the Cuddle Bug

And how did I go on? God’s grace pushed me to continue to care for the special children. I had a foster baby who filled my arms with joy. He was only in our home for just a month or so, but it was long enough to keep me from saying “never again”. When he moved out I took his crib down, though I left the Cuddle Bug’s crib in the same spot in our foster room. I had to leave it there or I would never use it again. And we received another fragile child.

For those of you who don’t know the story, we started into foster care because we have a son who was medically fragile due to a genetic disease, which at age 25 he still lives with. His health was challenging as an infant and there were NO other children in our state who had this disease. I used to cry because there was no one I could talk to and no one to help me. I had no idea there were so many different diseases and disabilities until Jered was born.

Once I learned to care for Jered, and he thrived, I wanted to help other families who had children with special needs. I had no idea how to do this. I was only one woman, and I worked outside the home full-time. What could I do?

I remember telling my husband that I wanted to help families like ours. I didn’t want to provide daycare and I didn’t know how I was going to help. And then I saw a newspaper story.

The news story told about infants and young children with disabilities who needed special care. Their parents often needed a break and the state was looking for those who had some extra time and patience to provide “Respite Care” for these little ones.

RESPITE CARE

I had never heard of that before. Even though Jered had his own special needs not one person told me what respite care was. Now that I was reading about it in the news story I realized that was what I wanted to do. I figured if I was caring for Jered, and I was doing okay at that, maybe I could provide respite for a family who needed it.

To provide respite care in our state you need to be a licensed foster home. We went to an informational meeting, and Jeff and I agreed we did NOT want to provide foster care! That was not for us. Our home was licensed (for foster care) and we became respite care providers.

In our classes we didn’t talk about children having life-threatening events, we mostly talked about the social and legal issues of foster children. We had no idea that death could or would be upon our doorstep.

So after the Cuddle Bug, when I left the crib up in the room, I asked the Lord to help me care for the child who would next sleep there. He is so faithful! Memories of the Cuddle Bug were so fresh. When I heard a siren outside I would burst into tears. I remember while driving one day I heard a siren and I had to pull over because I was crying so hard I couldn’t drive.

But affected or not we allowed a new foster baby into our home. She arrived with a quiet little cry and the first night she was in the crib I slept on the floor next to her. I was terrified that I might not hear her if she needed me.

And God comforted me. The next night I slept in my bed. It was difficult to sleep, but again God comforted me. And we cared for that new little one till it was time for her to move on.

It took a whole year to grow used to the fact our little ones were only on loan from God. And God continued to comfort me, as well as my family.

Although we don’t provide foster or respite care anymore we are still caring for our children with special needs. Jered doesn’t need my care (well not much) anymore, but Emily and Grace do. And though I feel like I live on the edge with Emily’s health at times, I know God is there, to comfort and ease the stress. He sends people into our lives to help and support us. And if we haven’t said so, we are SO grateful!

Thanks for listening~

Michelle